Lustige Sachen zum ablachen

[Zeitauge]

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Z1eFdUSnaQM
MRÖMMM MRÖMMM!!!111 HUOAAAA!!!!!!!!!!2

[Sebbo]

Einer der besten Filmszenen überhaupt:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DCJc8Oemwj0


Und hier noch ein paar Auftritte von "Eure Mütter":
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FmdVUfLjDq0
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Smbf7...eature=related
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HwzJf...eature=related
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-E4Zc...eature=related

Ich finde die einfach zu geil.

[Nesis]

@Sebbo:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KVf6QqIT-tw

Genau mein Humor.

[Ianus]

This thread reminds me of them so much, so... Latvian joke time!

Joke:
Three men are in ship. One Latvian, one Russian, one Lithuanian. Lithuanian take out one bottle wodka. Russian kill Lithuanian, then drink wodka. Then Latvian wait until Russian drink self to sleep, then kill. Is end.

Joke:
Latvian: Is so cold.
All: How cold is?
Latvian: Very. Also dark.

Joke:
A fishmonger says to a bootblack, "Are there any more potato left?" Bootblack says, "Yes, one. But it has gone bad." The fishmonger says, "I am very hungry. I have not eaten for three days. I shall eat it, even if it makes me very ill." And bootblack says, "I did not speak truth. In reality, there is no food left. You shall go hungry yet another day, my friend."

Joke:
Man is hungry. He steal bread to feed family. Get home, find all family have sent Siberia! “More bread for me,” man think. But bread have worm.

Joke:
Janis: I hope my son does not die during night.
Guntis: What is "hope"?
Janis: Yes. I know what you say.
Guntis: No. I am serious. What is hope?
Janis: In truth, I do not know.

Joke:
Questioning: Why did chicken cross road?
Answering: I have not seen chicken since I was very young, on my parents' farm. This is before the Cossacks slaughtered them. I can still hear screams of sister as soldiers rape her. But back to question, where did you see chicken? I am very, very hungry.

Joke:
Man car break down near house of farmer. Take shelter in barn. Find farmer daughter in barn. Oh! Hot stuff! But TOO LATE! Is already rape by soldier.

Joke:
Knock knock
Who’s there?
Latvian.
Latvian who?
Please open door. Is cold.

Joke:
Latvian walk into bar with poodle under one arm and salami under other. Eat salami first.

...

Gott, hier sind so viele faule Witze. ich muss sie alle posten.

Joke:
How many Latvian is take screw in light bulb?
Only one. Obtain light bulb is hard part. You have potato?

Joke:
How is get one-arm Latvian out of tree?
Is no one-arm Latvian! Why you silly? All go Center for Great Peaceful Physical Reassignment. You no ask.

Joke:
Why six is afraid seven? Because seven have many friend politburo.

Joke:
Latvian walk into bar with pig on shoulder. Bartender say, “That look delicious!” But pig say, “No. Is Latvian. Taste is similar to dog.”

Joke:
Latvian walk into bar with mule. Bartender say, “Why so long face?” Latvian say, “I was thinking of my daughter. She has been lie with soldier for potato feed baby. “

Joke:
Is dead dog in road. Is dead Latvian in road. What difference?
Dog have fur keep warm. Also, freedom. And dog try eat poop for pleasure not just survive. So many thing!

Joke:
Latvian is rub lamp find genii. Genii say, “What is three wishes?” Latvian say, “I wish potato!” Then, POOF! Potato! Latvian so happy! “Oh! Is potato! Is potato!” say Latvian. Genii ask, “What is next wish?” Latvian is say, “I wish you go away so can enjoy potato!” POOF! Too bad. Also, was only lamp.

...

Joke:
Three Latvian are brag about sons. “My son is soldier. He have rape as many women as want,” say first Latvian. “Zo?” second say, “My son is farmer. He have all potato he want!” Third Latvian wait long time, then say, “My son is die at birth. For him, struggle is over.” “Wow! You are win us,” say others. But all are feel sad.

Joke:
Boy: But mother, I no are like grandma.
Mother: Eat anyway. Is no potato.

Joke:
Latvian walk into bar and say, “I have not eaten for many days. One full beer will be too much for me. How much just maybe one shot beer?” Bartender say, “This is can do for you. Is two centimes.” Latvian say, “Oh. I was hoping it would be less. I do not have that much.”

Joke:
What are one potato say other potato?
Premise ridiculous. Who have two potato?

Joke:
How many Latvian is take screw in light bulb?
25. One screw in, 24 ride bicycle generator for 1-hour shift. But time probably better spend search food.

Joke:
Three Latvian girl are walk down street. One have knife, one have gun, one have window. They are meet soldier. Soldier is ask first girl, “Why you are have knife?” “If you try rape me, I stab!” she say. Okay! Second girl, “Why you are have gun?” “If you try rape me, I shoot!” she say. Okay! Third girl, “Why you are have window?!?” “If you try rape me, I jump out!”

Joke:
Latvian is capture by cannibals. Cannibals say, “We are kill you and eat you and use skin for canoe. But you may choose means of your death.” Latvian say, “Okay! You are give me fork, please!” But oops! Is forgot how use!

...

[T.U.F.K.A.S.]

bestes review aller zeiten

THE!!!! HEHEHEHE!!!

[Laterna]

[MaxikingWolke22]

[T.U.F.K.A.S.]

hab gestern nen coolen witz erzählt bekommen musste sehr lachen dabei:

ein opa kommt bei seinem 18-jährigen enkel ins zimmer, dieser sitzt vor der playstation und zockt ballerspiele. opa sagt: "mein gott, immer diese computerspiele. weißt du was? in deinem alter bin ich mit meinen kumpels nach paris gefahren. wir sind ins moulin rouge, haben da gesoffen, auf den tischen getanzt, den tussis an die titten gegrabscht und haben dann die zeche geprellt. und du hockst hier und spielst!" der enkel dann so: "wow, echt? coole sache!" er steht auf und ward bis zum nächsten nachmittag nicht mehr gesehen. opa sieht ihn an einer bushaltestelle aus dem bus steigen, ein arm vergipst, humpelnd und mit blauen flecken übersät. opa: "was zum teufel hast du bitte gemacht?" der enkel: "nun, ich bin mit meinen kumpels nach paris. wir sind ins moulin rouge, haben da gesoffen, auf den tischen getanzt, den tussis an die titten gegrabscht und haben dann die zeche geprellt." opa: "und dann?" enkel: "dann haben uns die türsteher verprügelt. wieso haben die das nicht bei dir gemacht?" opa: "ich war mit der wehrmacht da."

total stumpf

[Kael]

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rXMIQDVOs98

Eins gleich vorweg (weil man ja nie weiß, ob man nicht Ärger wegen sowas bekommt oder nicht): Das Video macht sich über die Terroristen lustig und nicht über die Religion von ihnen!
Zumindest konnten wir mit unserem Ex-10.-Klass-Geschichtslehrer herzlich darüber lachen. Der hat uns das nämlich gezeigt.

@steel: 1A. Ehrlich.

[Satyras]

http://www.spielefilmetechnik.de/aid...t_Roulette.cfm

[Ianus]

The spider plant cringed as its owner brought forth the watering can. "I am a spider plant!" it cried indignantly. "How dare you water me before my time! Guards!" it called. "Guards!"

Borin, its owner, placed the watering can on the table and looked at it. "You will be watered," he said.

"You do not dare to water me!" laughed the plant.

"You will be watered," said Borin.

"Do not water me!" wept the plant.

"You will be watered," said Borin.

I watched this exchange. Truly, I believed the plant would be watered. It was plant, and on Gor it had no rights. Perhaps on Earth, in its permissive society, which distorts the true roles of all beings, which forces both plant and waterer to go unh appy and constrained, which forbids the fulfillment of owner and houseplant, such might not happen. Perhaps there, it would not be watered. But it was on Gor now, and would undoubtedly feel its true place, that of houseplant. It was plant. It would be watered at will. Such is the way with plants.

Borin picked up the watering can, and muchly watered the plant. The plant cried out. "No, Master! Do not water me!" The master continued to water the plant. "Please, Master," begged the plant, "do not water me!" The master continued to water the plant. It was plant. It could be watered at will.

The plant sobbed muchly as Borin laid down the watering can. It was not pleased. Too, it was wet. But this did not matter. It was plant.

"You have been well watered," said Borin.

"Yes," said the plant, "I have been well watered." Of course, it could be watered by its master at will.

"I have watered you well," said Borin.

"Yes, master," said the plant. "You have watered your plant well. I am plant, and as such I should be watered by my master."

The cactus plant next to the spider plant shuddered. It attempted to cover its small form with its small arms and small needles. "I am plant," it said wonderingly. "I am of Earth, but for the first time, I feel myself truly plantlike. On Earth, I w as able to control my watering. I often scorned those who would water me. But they were weak, and did not see my scorn for what it was, the weak attempt of a small plant to protect itself. Not one of the weak Earth waterers would dare to water a plant if it did not wish it. But on Gor," it shuddered, "on Gor it is different. Here, those who wish to water will water their plants as they wish. But strangely, I feel myself most plantlike when I am at the mercy of a strong Gorean master, who may water m e as he pleases."

"I will now water you," said Borin, the cactus's Gorean master.

The cactus did not resist being watered. Perhaps it was realizing that such watering was its master's to control. Too, perhaps it knew that this master was far superior to those of Earth, who would not water it if it did not wish to be watered.

The cactus's watering had been finished. The spider plant looked at it.

"I have been well watered," it said.

"I, too, have been well watered," said the cactus.

"My master has watered me well," said the spider plant.

"My master, too, has watered me well," said the cactus.

"I am to be placed in a hanging basket on the porch," said the spider plant.

"I, too, am to be placed in a hnaging basket on the porch," said the cactus.

"I wish you well," said the spider plant.

"I, too, wish you well," said the cactus.

"Tal," said the spider plant.

"Tal, too," said the cactus.

I did not think that the spider plant would object to being watered by its master again. For it realized that it was plant, and that here, unlike on Earth, it was likely to be owned and watered by many masters.

[Sebbo]

Autofahrerin rasiert Bikinizone und baut Unfall

[Auratus]

Wurde das schon gepostet?

[VD3???]

D.C.Crimson@myspace

[Hummelmann]

D.C.Crimson@myspace

...

Moooooment willst du damit etwa andeuten das es sich dabei um diesen D.C.Crimson handelt?

Und ich mag hier ein bisschen Slowpoke mäßig unterwegs sein, aber das würde den Schluss nahe legen das VD3??? und D.C.Crimson die selbe Person sind. Den etwas gelesen von ihm wirst du wohl nicht haben da D.C.Crimsons letzter Post am 27.07.2008 um 00:02 getätigt wurde und du dich erst am 03.09.2009 registriert hast.
Gedacht hatte ich es mir ja schon immer wegen des ähnlichen Postingverhaltens wie ich es jetzt einfach mal nenne, und für viele mag es offensichtilch gewesen sein aber damn I was shitting brixx when I saw it.

....
"You will be watered," said Borin.
...

...

Nice, ich war Eregter als man es in der Regel sein sollte, wenn über das gießen von Pflanzen spricht.

[Laterna]

[Seraph]

Sodele, lustig wars eine lange Zeit lang, aber das ist jetzt vorbei hier.
900 Posts sollen genug sein und ein neuer Thread ist da
Viel Spaß bei den lustigen Sachen zum Ablachen #2!