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There was another such incident a while later, but while I was still in my teens. I was taking the last train home from the disco, which was fashionable at the time. My (new) girlfriend, who was still young and didn’t know how to drink responsibly, had had too many sake-and-cokes, and suddenly, in the middle of the very crowded train, realized she had to haku (puke). “What am I gonna do?” she said. “It can’t be helped – haku in my sleeve. It’s gross, but it’s better than spewing gero on everyone else.”
Of course the people around us noticed her puking into my sleeve, but they felt sorry for us, and told me, “You’re a good guy!” Then she had to haku into my other sleeve. Naturally, both sleeves were covered in gero. But once again, the girl didn’t understand the way I showed her my devotion, and I never heard from her again, either.
Why didn’t they get it? I worried that, despite the best of intentions, did I go to far? Did I seem hentai to them? Or were they simply too young to understand? As I grew into an adult, I continued to ask myself these questions. They obsessed me. How can I formulate a philosophy which explains the way I express my love for women?
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