Transformers 2 - Revenge of the Fallen

[Ianus]

From what I remember - dizzy, confused and still feeling slightly violated, 24 hours after the fact - the whole thing pivots around the Autobots and humans stopping the Decepticons activating a machine buried on Earth to harvest the sun. We learn that six ancient Transformers built the machine but swore not to use it on planets that had any life on them. All well and good, except the opening scene shows the Transformers duking out with some spear-carrying types on earth, which makes the fact that they installed the machine on earth a) pointless and b) contrary, seeing as they seemed happy enough to smash the shit out of our ancestors.

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Lolwhut?

Also, Tyrese Gibson bros down with Optimus Prime in one scene, while we all sit through the tedium of the stuffed shirt/fall guy bashing through a “Let me get this clear…” speech, reeling off all the plot points we need to remember from the first movie to comprehend what the hell’s going on in this one.

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Lollol.