Saying "I apologize" is the very same as saying "I'm sorry", unless your at a
funeral.
------------
Sort of is a harmless thing to say.. unless you add it behind stuff like "i love
you", "your going to live" or "Its a boy!"
---------
i was walking down the street and this guy waved at me, than he said "im sorry, i
tought you were someone else"... I said "I am"
--------
I saw a sign that said "Watch for Children!"... I tought "Thats a fair trade"...
--------
This girl was really amazing. She showed me the dressing room. She said "If you need
anything, I'm Jill".... I was like "oh my god... i never met a woman with a
conditional Identity"... "what if i dont need anything?.... Who are you?"
-------
I think they named Oranges before they named Carrots.
"what are these?" - "these are orange....oranges"
"and these?" - "... oh shit...long stickies?"
-------
when they were nameing the animals, some people were lazy... Anteater? whats he
doing? "hes eating ants.. DONE.. NEXT!"
-------
I think a bad place for a fire would be the factory were they make these
fake-birthday-candles
-------
i think it would be cool if you were writing a ransom-note on your computer and the
paperclip showed up
"it looks like your writing a ransom-note, you need help with that? you should use
stronger language, youd get more money"
---------
Once i had to go to the bathroom in a club, there were no one in there... so i sat
down... somebody had written on the stall
"Metallica rulez..." under that it said
"Metallica sux..." under that it said
"You suck..." under that it said
"Fuck you..." and i tought...
"Man... a lot of people shit with pens"
----------
This summer i wanna go to the beach and burry metal objects and write on them "Get a
life"
----------
I love the beach, love to get there really early, before everyone else shows up and
take like 30 bottles and write notes in them and throw them all into the water. and
i wait for everyone to come to the beach. when someone goes to pick up a bottle i go
up behind them, cause when they open it, inside is a note that sais "im standing
right behind you"
-----------
My Computer beat me at chass, but than i beat him at kickboxing
-----------
I think batteries are the most traumatic objects of all objects. because other
objects just break or stop working, but batteries... they die
-----------
I want to make a jigsaw with 40.000 pieces and when you finish it, it sais "GO
OUTSIDE!"