Pornofyrkant #9 - Rote Schwänze mit weißem Ende & Border Collie Bitches

[Ranarion]

Gut gemeinter Ratschlag: Das nächste mal die Zahnspange aus dem Mund nehmen, wenn ihr versucht zu rappen

...

Oder gar nicht mehr rappen.

[Gala]

Hier Steel:
http://www.spiegel.de/kultur/kino/0,...0.html#ref=rss

[T.U.F.K.A.S.]

Hier Steel:
http://www.spiegel.de/kultur/kino/0,...0.html#ref=rss

...

Danke. Das ist echt ein wunderschöner Artikel, der perfekt meine Meinung über Nic Cage widerspiegelt (Ha! SPIEGELt!). Und ganz ehrlich: Filme mit Nic Cage sieht man nur, um zu schauen, wie krass er dort durchdrehen wird. Deshalb ist "Bad Lieutenant" auch einer der besten Filme aller Zeiten, weil Nic Cage am cagigsten ist in dem Teil.

[luckyless]

Hier Steel:
http://www.spiegel.de/kultur/kino/0,...0.html#ref=rss

...

Ich hätte jetzt beinahe gefragt: Warum gibst du steel seinen eigenen Artikel zum lesen. o.O

[Kael]

Shop Karl.com? D8

[Icetongue]

Little Ninja Brothers was one of my favorite child hood games back in `95. My brother and I would spend entire nights trying to make our way through the game via running away from every battle. A lot of my memories from my childhood involve this game, and sadly when we moved in 2001 we lost our NES and all our games.
You can imagine my surprise when I passed a yard sale just last week and saw not only a working NES, but also this game for 5 dollars. I approached the stand and asked the old man behind the table if the sign was right. Confirming that it was, he sold the products to me. As I walked away I heard him say to me "Enjoy the game "Little Ninja Brothers"".. or at least that's what I convinced myself he said at the time.

The NES was a tad yellow, though it worked fine. The Little Ninja Brothers cart was in much worse shape. The plastic was yellowed and the sticker was peeling. For $5 though, I couldn't care less as long as it worked.
Being an attention whore, I hooked the NES into my capture card so that I could later share my childhood with the internet.. and thank god I did or else this story may seem SILLY.

The first time I put the game in, it loaded for a second before freezing. Not a big deal, some pins didn't connect. I blow on the game and reset, and the second try the game works fine. Well, that's putting it a bit loose.. it runs fine, but for whatever reason on the title screen neither of the brothers has pupils. I didn't think much of it at the time, it's probably some dust on one of the 72 pins that just so happens to render the pupils.. as long as the game is playable I'm fine with it.
However, it didn't take long for me to begin questioning this. Not only are all the NPCs missing their pupils, but the text is spazzing out too. I'm no nerd, but I figure this may be one of those poor bootlegs I hear so much about in the news. Somebody must have messed up the hex value that controls eyes in this game! However. the first time in the over-world I notice that pupils aren't the only hex value these Koreans tampered with.
Damn near everything is a bit.. off. Random buildings look like garbage data, text isn't wrapping right, and the music seems.. distorted. That is while it lasts. It seems every time I change screens the music loses a channel or so, eventually becoming nothing more than a couple beeps. I'm starting to lose commitment to the idea of "as long as the game works.."

When I finally get to the Mayor of Deli-chous things start to go down hill. The scene of Jack getting drugged is unnerving at best. Jack lets out cries of "no" before the text turns into a mess of garbage across the screen. At this point I am terrified, however something is compelling me to keep playing. At this point it is my duty to beat this glitched game.
Pushing myself to move on, I go to get the amulet from Mouchee Mouse.. which looking back was a huge mistake. Her silly face was now what I can only describe as hyper realistic gore (my capture card seems to have not picked up the hyper realism). Peeling back the skin on her face, she asks me if I laughed.. of course not. I was disgusted and terrified. Not even blast processing could produce what I saw.. something change in me at this moment.

The Korean bastard who hacked this game was sick. I wanted to stop right here, but couldn't... I had to move on.. and god I wish I hadn't.
Moving on to fight Tub-a-Tummy, by this point the music was completely gone. Unnerved I fought my was past the eyeless enemies and glitched scenery to make it to the boss.
Rewarded only with my game crashing, I had to pull out my camera to record the final moments. The game flashed photo-realistic images of my dead family as I fumbled my camera around in my hands. As I finally got the camera up, I heard a crash in my hallway.

Thinking back, the old man didn't tell me "Enjoy the game "Little Ninja Brothers"", what he had said was "Enjoy the game, Little Ninja Brothers"... My name is Little Ninja Brothers. I was a spooky ghost the entire time.

Fuck

[luckyless]

...kinda freaks me out...

[Corti]

Icey, im ersten Moment war ich der Meinung ausversehen im "scheussliche Textblöcke"-Topic gelandet zu sein, dann tauchte das Video auf.

Ich begegnete grad beim wilden MP3-Shufflen einem meiner Lieblingssongs, REM - Be Mine [mittelmässige Quali auf YT[ . Beste Lovesong-lyrics ever imo.

"I never thought of this as funny
It speaks another world to me
I wanna be your Easter bunny
I wanna be your Christmas tree"

Benzin kostet "nur" 1,52€ (fast kostenlos) , draussen isses düster und kalt, ich geh joggen, yesss. Zusammenhangslose Information.

[T.U.F.K.A.S.]

ANYBODY KNOW WHY RICHIE DID BOBBY LUPO???

[Corti]

Könnte man auch einen Vorlesewettbewerb draus machen aus dem Text!

[T.U.F.K.A.S.]

Aber wenn schon vorlesen dann im albernen Brooklyn-Akzent/italienischen Dialekt.

Und ohne Scheiß: Der Film ist übertrieben geil.

[Corti]

Aber wenn schon vorlesen dann im albernen Brooklyn-Akzent

...

Man, doin' this brookly accent makes it difficult to concentrate on cardgames.

[Sperlingsprinz]

Könnte man auch einen Vorlesewettbewerb draus machen aus dem Text!

...

Dafür!

Den Text habe ich übrigens nicht zu Ende gelesen. Zu viel Seagal für meine Geschmack. Aber ein für die Leidenschaft mit der steel scheinbar Stunden über diesen Mann sinnieren kann.

[T.U.F.K.A.S.]

Man, doin' this brookly accent makes it difficult to concentrate on cardgames.

...

Nyeh, I know dis is a real problem mayn!

Und was Seagal angeht: Er ist recht schwer zu verteidigen, aber ich fand ihn immer cool. Und alles bis "Exit Wounds" ist arschgeil bis anschaubar, ab "Ticker" wird es extrem furchtbar, wobei einige DTV-Schinken von Seagal nicht so übel sind ("The Keeper", "Belly of the Beast" und "Into the Sun" sind ganz okay).

[T.U.F.K.A.S.]

Zeit für was politisches:

Ich bin auch dafür, Kanye zu arrestieren!

Edith findet übrigens, dass Russen fucking scary sind!


Edith sagt außerdem:

My little Kony - putting "infant" back in "infantry"~

Oh, und:
North Korean Animu is best Animu!

[T.U.F.K.A.S.]

Mir ist kein Tripplepost zu schade um Nordkoreas Großartigkeit euch allen aufs Auge zu drücken! Denn wie wir alle wissen ist Nordkorea beschdes Korea! Und hat vor allem die beschden Animes!



Zum Verständnis: Die bösen Kapitalisten (= USA and such) sind die Bad Ass-Wölfe, die Japaner werden durch die Wiesel dargestellt und die Beschd-Koreaner sind die schwulen Eichhörnchen. Nichts desto trotz: Der Anime ist GEIL!

Und ich werd sowas von Furry für die Imperialisten-Füchsin!

[Sperlingsprinz]

Mooooooooment mal!!
Was sehen meine müden Augen denn da? Eine Schusswaffe wird abgefeuert? Das ist ja wie deutsches Anime-Fernsehen vor 10 Jahren! Wuhu!

Btw, die Füchsin ist schon so eine sexy Hexy. Ich glaube die Nordkoreaner lesen heimlich den Fyrkant und klauen Ideen...

[WeTa]

So viel rumgezoome!
Das ist ja fast so schlimm wie in irgendwelchen Ninjafilmen

[Holo]

Und nun was Lehrreiches zum Thema Urheberrecht:



ACTAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[Corti]

Da es hier eh nur um Schwänze und Füchse geht: Sorge dich nicht, hör auf Dr. Fuchs.